Gravity slows racing heart Holding breath Lungs are full
Thankful
I can hold my spirit
Still
Or set her free
Wild like horses Galloping into the river’s edge
“Rafiq”
This is an image of my horse out on a trail ride. Rafiq is a rescue Arabian. Photograph was taken by the trainer, Elisa Bohannon who is the owner and trainer at Blue Barn Stable. More info on Blue Barn: https://www.facebook.com/BlueBarnEquine/
There is so much happening in the world and with all my roles–mom, wife, daughter, sister, friend, teacher, neighbor, voter…I sometimes forget the role of SELF. The role self and all I need in order to have harmony. On empty, I can’t accomplish much.
III.
On empty,
I won’t get very far
if I am driving –my body– this vehicle, on empty
will putter, stall, stop. Getting nowhere. I’ll just be stuck here, stuck with these emotions, stuck with these fears, stuck on EMPTY.
IV.
Breathe in.
Breathe out.
ask your heart—
May I have energy?
She will say, yes. She looks out for you. Pumps life into you without any other reason than she loves you. Once-in-a-while, she’d like you to take a moment in gratitude. Place your hand on her, feel her strength and say, “Thank you.”
So Heart,
“Thank you. Thank you for beating all these years, for giving me life for all these years. Such a gift to see my daughter grow, to see my son grow, to see the sun rise and set 16,790 times–truly, that’s a miracle.
“Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside, you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing. You must wake up with sorrow. You must speak to it till your voice catches the thread of all sorrows and you see the size of the cloth.” ~Naomi Shihab Nye
“And love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love.” ~Lin-Manuel Miranda
for my daughter, Miranda
Before you know what love really is You have to strip yourself Of everything Every feeling Every article of clothing Every sound Taste Smell
Get rid of it all
Every material thing You ever felt You have to get rid Of what you thought love is/or was
You have to give birth (or hold a child or a butterfly or a miracle or faith or race your horse across an empty cornfield without bit or saddle)
Love is love unaware Of anything But everything Like bravery Like a caterpillar spreading her wings Knowing she doesn’t yet have wings You too, don’t need wings Because you already know how to fly As you grand jeté Landing softly but with firmness Only a mountain understands A thousand years later As the sun sets and kisses Earth goodnight
A mother rocks Nurses Coos Her golden, littlest love to sleep
Before you know what love is You have to empty your soul Like a yogi Empties breath All the way out until lung is flat And the heart muscle has to remember How to pump Because life is not without
Hope
It has to have hope Else we drown One By One Until it is just Adam and Eve, again Standing naked But this time they don’t see Because they’re blind And maybe this time
We’ll get it right
We’ll all fall into an abyss And swim, and swim
We’ll be familiar with the Darkness Because we never knew anything else Like we are back inside the Womb From which we all came A quiet blackness Of warmth Of love Safe Content Alone
Before you know what love is You have to empty your pockets all the way out